necromance; flaunt it, halt it.

please be good

2011-10-07T02:35:00.002+08:00

Hi October. I just need to pour out my feelings now. I'm the kind of person who cannot go to sleep if I faced any problems. Say what not, boyfriend, friends, family. Basically, anyone. I clearly do not understand how one can go to be with all the shitty stuffs that they are containing right at that point on time. I cannot get to sleep. Go figure.

You know, I have my limits. I, for once, can explode too. I am just a normal being. I like to be listened (not just heard) when speak. Literally won't just work. But tonight, I have no choice. Like it or not, I need to let my problems sleep too.

I'm trying to work a lot for this few months cause I feel guilty enough that my parents are providing me for this one month. I hope people around me would understand my situation and would not get angry for spending less time with you guys. I apologized.

I really want my October to be a good one. Amin.

Positive mind for a future start

2011-09-27T22:16:00.002+08:00

Hi. I'm blogging here, prolly just for the sake of it. Well, maybe. I kept saying how I don't want my blog to be influenced by my sorrow and agony. Sounded a little extreme, but just in case. So right now, I'm here, hopefully trying at emitting these positive vibes that I'm creating. Life right now is humanly good. New job, new semester but, same boyfriend. No, don't take that wrong. I'm awesome-ly glad that he is still sticking around and I still enjoy his company. In fact, very much.

I feel like I need to get rid of these two big zits on my cheeks and life would be, perfect. Just kidding.

love for me.

2011-09-20T00:28:00.002+08:00

There are days when I thought, screw you, screw all of you. I never want anyone to make an impact on my life anymore. Not being happy, nor sad. Clearly, I was wrong. No matter what you do, what your life is about, naturally people affects you. You promised yourself, you're no gonna let yourself stuck with this shit. You'll make sure, you'll freaking make sure that you will not land yourself in the load of crap. Until one day, one fine day, that you will meet someone. Someone who will change your views about everything, will change your personality, or even the smallest detail that you yourself don't acknowledge.

Say, you met this guy/girl. But for the past that happened, you tell yourself not to make that same mistake anymore. Not to let yourself get hurt. But unknowingly, everyone make that mistake.

of falling in love.

First, you'll be happy, for that is your honeymoon period. You smile, you make plans, you laugh, you practically had the time of your life. So, that one day, little by little, problems starts to build. Minor problems like movie shows to major problems like trusting issues and third party. You thought, that could be the end of it. But you don't realized, that's the start of a real relationship. Being in a happy relationship is easy. But standing by each other while having problems really depicts a true relationship. It's hard, of course. That's why people get out of them so easily. But, have you ever wonder about your future. Don't you look back on your past and wanting to re-living them again. It's sad how relationships end just like that.

Be patient. Not all time, relationships could be a happy thing. Just make sure you stand by them and telling yourself, everything would be all right. It sucks, but it's gonna be all right.

I'm not sure if I'm side-tracking but I, have my own relationship problem. We never had a case of third party in a relationship. But that's not the only problem that could wreck something you once build. It's not my fault, but it's not his fault too. All I want is for him to make me feel that I'm someone in his life. Not just by saying I am, but the little actions that he do. I know he love me, but there's always issues that made it to being so petty. I don't even know what I want. He said if he were to do this then I'll get mad, and if he were to do that, I'll get mad too. More helpless I will be.

He's the only person I want to share my happiness and sorrow. And if he's not there, who will? I feel so down right now, like deep down from the universe. I love him so much but are we the future of each others' lives? That's something not I, not him, not you will know. I wanna fight for this relationship, but am I worthy of him? It's so common of me to have tears in front of him. So much that it might meant nothing for him. But for me? I told myself, no more tears. So I didn't cry. For a lot of times, I kept these tears to myself. Unfortunately, it started to build up. Slowly, my heart is carrying all the sorrows that I hid behind the smiles. And now, I'm letting go. I tried being a strong girl. I tried to be the best at everyone's eye. But clearly, I failed. I don't even know what to do anymore. No one can give me advice, no one will listen. No one.

But me.

Live with it

2011-06-19T00:05:00.003+08:00

Hi. Do you still remember me? Yes, I'm still the founder of thefinalglory. Such a waste that I haven't been updating it that much. Things have changed, memories have grown. I'm unsure of myself. But why like this? Yes, a lot of things in my life have moved on. Like? Think for yourself. I feel that many people who have been in and out of my life have misunderstood me. A lot. They tend to think what they want to instead of hearing me out. I'm sick and tired of this. I'd rather be alone than be with people who judge me by what they see.

Damn you people. Sick.

I feel the need to let this out and still be myself, and importantly, positive. Till then.

2011-04-27T23:14:00.002+08:00

This is stupid. This is so fucking stupid. I want to end it all.

2011-03-03T19:23:00.000+08:00

no more love story publish.

syuha.

dreams

2011-01-10T23:18:00.007+08:00

So, the day that I declare an official hiatus, I had the urge to cuddle with thefinalglory. I have come to realise, thefinalglory has been on one's perspective. It was more on self-opinionated blog. So, I made up my mind. This should instead be a general one - something which every single human alive here could relate to. If you really can't figure out. You'll see.

Every girl have their own dream. Dream; sky is the limit. Your dream life, your dream career, your dream house, your dream closet and the forever lasting dream; your dream guy. Your very own prince charming. We wished that we can have the most loving guy who loves you just the way you are, the one who first, secretly love you from afar. Then trying to love what you love, and do what you do best. He will catch your attention, and then started sending you goodnight text. He will jokingly say he miss you when you guys were just friends, whereby in fact, he really do. From hanging out with your cliques and him, you began hanging out, alone with him. Holding hands, catching glance. And from there, you started being more than friends. But in fact, the dream is only starting to begin. Your mind - the guy will stand in the rain for you, would pluck out flowers from the neighborhood garden on your birthday, remembering every single little detail about you. You know, the kind of stuff that will get you to even higher than cloud nine.

Sure, love is a beautiful journey. But come on. If you did watch Easy A:

"I want John Cusack holding a boombox outside my window. I wanna ride off on a lawnmower with Patrick Dempsey. I want Jake from Sixteen Candles waiting outside the church for me. I want Judd Nelson thrusting his fist into the air because he knows he got me. Just once I want my life to be like an 80’s movie, preferably one with a really awesome musical number for no apparent reason."

Things like this hardly happen in real life now. Dreams are supposed to stay a dream. Love could be sweet. But reality check, it's not going to happen, at least not to that extreme. If you still don't get what I mean. Girls, if you are in a relationship, do not expect much. Expectations are a destroyer. Boys are not perfect, we aren't too. So live in this inevitable truth. Trust me on this, it will get better this way. Short note for single; no need for the rush. You'll know when you see one.

Well, having said that, I am not trying to acknowledge girls as dreamers. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. And hopefully, if there are boys reading this, please.

Small things do matter. We know you can't do this magical things we dream of. We are trying hard not to expect heaven. But sometimes, at the end of the day, we just want you to think about us and make yourself smile. I'm not going to trash boys. As matter of fact, I hope, what I have said above do make sense to you.

With this I end,

[sorry]

2011-01-10T16:08:00.002+08:00

on hiatus. have a great year everyone.

4aMin.

2010-12-26T17:11:00.005+08:00

It's a raining December. I didn't even write in to thefinalglory during my 19th. However, I don't need the fireworks or those happenings in fairytale right now. I'm more half of good if I get to lead a happy and normal and never sadistic life. It's gonna be 2011 soon. All the best everyone, all the best.

2010-11-13T14:30:00.002+08:00

I'm better.

a far cry from.

2010-11-12T17:21:00.010+08:00

{pictureless}

There's never a day where I don't feel like this. What sort of feelings? Feelings. A presentiment on the conscious or unconscious state of mind, a sentiment of a solid which could appear for fondness or otherwise. I wish I can this feelings whereby you are in the cloud seven, always smiling about the ridiculous stuffs that people don't find funny, going home in the train turning on your ipod and listening to sweet words lyrics that matches you happy thoughts, you know. Right now, I'm feeling something, and its not that. If you could just try. I thought November this year would be something I look forward to. And just so you know, I'm still feeling pathetic - third-rate, inferior, and worthless. It's different all for the wrong reason.

Hey you are only a few centimeters away from me but I'm sorry I don't have the courage to tell you straight. I know no matter what I tried and what you did, I still love you. And some of you might know, my 19th is nearing. All I want is just you saying that you still do, love me, hug me, kiss me.

Am I different, or you are just not the same anymore?

♥ forever.

karma's a bitch.

2010-11-09T16:50:00.014+08:00

I don't need anyone to understand, so long you do. I don't need anyone to appreciate me, still, so long you do. I have no idea if I should still believe in karma - cause deep down I still do. I somehow knew this would happen. But I'm still holding on. Having to be right in front of you and still missing you at the same times is just too pathetic. What sins have I done to be having this feeling for almost everyday. And what if one day, maybe just one day I just cannot hold on anymore? I'm still holding on to you, cause I know, I want to be there when you need me. And once again, do I still think you need me anymore? I won't be long before gone. I'm sure things are just gonna go great for you and I should just make do with it. I still love you though. Do you?

Shove up words and give actions instead please. I'm begging you. I'm exhausted and my tears are all dried up.

"Hope is the dream of a soul awake.”

2010-10-26T11:43:00.004+08:00

It's too frightening - the dream

To see a bully, or be bullied in your dreams, signifies repressed rage. The bully may be seen as your shadow self which you have rejected. Also, it shows that there's something in my past that I just wanna let go. At least I'm trying to.

Damn this. Shrug it off.

what-ifs.

2010-10-15T02:15:00.004+08:00

The hardest part of falling in love is to get out of it.

How true is that? No, I'm not saying my relationship is over. But really, that quote is just mind-boggling enough. I'm scared of myself. Frankly, I don't know what's my limit. I really don't want to love anyone so much - much more than me. Being alone always kept you thinking, with those what-ifs.

What if.

I'm very sad.

< 3

2010-10-07T00:58:00.001+08:00

It's October. And I still love you.

hpynss-

2010-09-23T02:17:00.002+08:00

I got so much too say, but I don't know where to start. I have been writing to thefinalglory but it never knew me. I'm an average girl aged 19 on the twenty-seventh november nineteen-ninety-one oh-nine-fourteen hours. When asked about myself, I really didn't know what to say. About my past, present, future. What should I say? That I school and work, I lead a repetitive life. I'm not interesting - I never were. But never did I wish to have one. All I wanted was to have a happy life, one where there's rainbow, from the shine of the after-rain, a nice wake-up call instead of an alarm, a great breakfast with people I adore. Do I really hope that much? I admit, I'm holding my tears writing in here.

I am a girl who thinks too much. The good, the bad, and the ugly. I wasn't the popular kid in school. But I have a great ambition. To be happy. It's not I'm not, but it could have been better. But sometimes, even being happy isn't such a good thing after all. To make self happy, but to create the unhappiness of others, doesn't that define selfish? It never struck me hard before, there's never a definition for happiness. All along, I grew up sharing love with mates and families, I was indeed, what do I call that - happy. Though, I really thought that I put others above me. I get worried if they're down, joy when they're up. It hit me hard that time, and it still do. I won't let people try to please me. They will if they are and it's okay if they're not. And I'm never hard to please. So I wouldn't want anyone to think of me that way.

To the boy whom I greatestly adore. I really miss the thing we used to do in the past. Being around each others' arms, talking about ourselves. How we'd be shy around each other but yet so comfortable. How coincidence we can get; when wanting to meet, we met. I want to cuddle you in the night, watching the moon looking at us and reminiscing the hearts we shared. I wonder if it's the same for you.

I'll always love you.

calls for.

2010-09-20T02:26:00.005+08:00

I know I've been neglecting thefinalglory but it's never too late. It's the second week, so - Selamat Hari Raya to all muslims. Weather this past few days have been inconsistent. It's either the yellow sun or the dark clouds crying. Though, I hope tomorrow is going to be a breeze. I'm a little nervous, for I'm having an operation at KTP Hospital in around six hours time. It's minor, so not to worry. I'm just a little scared because I can't estimate the pain I'm going to face later on.

Anyways, ♥you told me something that upset me a little. I'm not angry, for sure, just a little upset. You apologized right after, I know. Saddens me, but I'll just hope that bad feeling is going to fade away. I'm sorry too.

it happens.

2010-09-03T03:09:00.004+08:00

you have screamed at an inanimate object for 'hurting you.' you have ran into a glass/screen door. you have jumped out of a moving vehicle. you have thought of something funny and laughed, and then people gave you weird looks. you have run into a tree/bush. you have been called a blond. you know that it IS possible to lick your elbow. you just tried to lick your elbow. (And failed.) you never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star had the same melody.you just sang them to make sure. you have tripped on your own feet and fallen. you have choked on your own spit. you have seen the Matrix and still don't get it. you type with three fingers or less. you have accidentally caught something on fire. you tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose. you have caught yourself drooling. you have fallen asleep in class. sometimes you just can't stop thinking. sometimes when you are telling a story you forget what you are talking about. people often shake their heads and walk away from you. you are often told to use your 'inside voice.' you use your fingers to do simple math. you have eaten a bug accidentally. you are taking this test when you should be doing something more important. you have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn't realize it. you've looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand/pocket the whole time. e.g. picks, cards, pens, phones, money, keys etc. you have posted bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen if you don't. you break a lot of things. you tilt your head when you're confused. you have fallen out of your chair before. when you're lying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture on the ceiling. the word "um" is used frequently. you don't know what "um" means. you say "what" and "huh" a lot.

This is another test to see how funny-dumb I can be - which pretty much, I'm sure I am. (:

hearts on fire

2010-08-25T01:42:00.003+08:00

The late night with the clouds outplaying the moon. And rife, I'm dead beat. I have a bad news - about Marvin. It saddens me everytime I think about it. Bea is not coming, for now. Philippines' Immigration stopped her from boarding the flight so the airplane ticket was revoked. When I saw the looks from Marvin, I felt him. I will feel what it's like if it happened to me. It's alright. There's still another month.

To my dearest boyfriend, whom the name I shall mention:

Muhammad Syafiq Bin Bahreen

You asked about my blog today. I wonder if you gonna stumble upon this post but again, if you are. I just want to say hello. I haven't been sort of the best paramour but do know that I always love you. Bad things happens, and it's for a reason. I hope I can make things better for us and yes, I'll always listen to you. I promise you, even if the sun rise on the other side, I'll be there for you and you, smiling.

♥ I really love you baby.

night sky

2010-08-22T01:50:00.005+08:00

Yes, it's been a long day. A harsh but loved - powerfully. I couldn't any much, say more how I have love that dearest boy, one I adore. I love you.

Week plus past, that, my holidays. I need to start hitting the books and mugg. Most of the modules are bothering me. I'm very worried. Sad. Is anyone going to help me with lecture notes all over the place? I hope. I'm excited for Marvin, his girlfriend is coming over to Singapore tomorrow. Last met more than 5 months ago. Take that. We are all going to accompany him fetch Bea - yes, name. At Changi Airport after work. Even I can't wait. Helplessly devoted guy. I'm that too.

You have a nice day, and be helplessly lovable and love your dear ones. Goodnight.

my dream, i love.

2010-08-12T22:59:00.007+08:00

Pages on tumblr is making me awed. I had loved the pages and I used to reblogged everything that made me smile - used. I just wished you knew the tumblr that I had. Cause I'm pretty much too scared. I wanted to tell you how I felt. For I waited, and I wait. Forever and a day. (:

I still love you bby. - http://thefinalglory.tumblr.com

amazing.

2010-08-04T15:35:00.005+08:00

How sweet can Bruno Mars be, singing Just the Way You Are? Aww.

Yes, I miss my amazing.

dumb-vader.

2010-07-19T18:59:00.003+08:00

forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out.gotten your head stuck between the stair rails.broken a chair by leaning back in it.had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking.choked on your own spit while you were talking.had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not, or had people tell you that your blonde highlights are going to your head.been caught staring at your crush by your crush.have looked for something for at least 5 min then realized it was in your hand.tried to push open a door that said pull.tried to pull open a door that said push.applied something else on your hair, thinking it was shampoo.have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else.have tripped and fallen down the stairs.have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave.have gotten gum stuck in your hair.had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble.have had the juice from a mini tomato squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it.have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard.have called one of your good friends by the wrong name.have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot.have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on.have fallen out of a moving vehicle.have run into a closed door.searched for your cell phone while you were talking on.it has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke.have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer.have gotten your hair stuck in a fan.tripped on a crack in the sidewalk.said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock.after someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it.put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside.have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else.ever been kicked out of a grocery store/off their property.touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc when its on, even though you knew it was hot.taken off your clothes to change into something else then accidentally put the old clothes back on.wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged.put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard.walked into a pole.wore two different earrings or shoes by accident/stolen someones shoes by accident.put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house.tried to take a picture of someone's eye with the flash on.gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small.walked out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it.went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there, you forgot what it is was that you were going to do.picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it.fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up.have poked yourself in the eye.listened on your earphones, thinking it was plugged in, when it actually wasn't.melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair.

see the bolds? yeah, i'm that dumb. :D

hot mess.

2010-07-08T16:58:00.004+08:00

It looks like it's gonna rain, does it? Alma mater is being a train these few days. Rushing through every prominent details that lecturers have, I'm gonna have a major train wreck. Theories and codings, spare me some time please. By any means, I have created my soul to be a better sophomore and be a pessimist, square one, academically. Everyone is ranting to head home now. I got no comments.

What's your most horrible death imagination?

2010-07-04T02:16:00.002+08:00

To die in lots of paper cuts. OTL.

shoot.

thoughts.

2010-07-03T16:18:00.003+08:00

With the same bright rising sun, I began to ponder. I get swayed easily, affected. I am a girl who has lots on her mind. I am a girl who can't get anything off her mind. A couple of days have past. It's July already. I have been waking up every single day feeling pessimistic. I don't want to loathe every single time the yellow circle shine or the white crescent talked to me. I need love. School is fine but I need to buck up more. I'll prolly work lesser and I want to ask for help.

Sucks being me today. Off to work now.

2010-06-29T00:02:00.004+08:00

The erected sol kissed me good morning. I am lethargic, still. Lectures and tutorials is, beyond any doubt, going to be a bummer. Only the first day and all the clouds began to gather in my mind creating the dark fog on the outer layer of my wonderful brain. It refuses to let anything in. Best of luck.

Fuck presentation.

butterflies and hurricanes.

2010-06-26T14:15:00.006+08:00

Needless to say, I bunked in on the couch anon, a tardy interlude. But, I was happy. I spent one of the most wonderful peppy and perky moments before that with inamorato, the nighttide upon the ol' buttermilk sky. Divulging everything on soul, sense and sanity, I knew him better. He's awesome. And that was the time which reminded me again, why I fall for the boy.

And it's mother's birthday. The best mother. I love you.

anamnesis

2010-06-25T02:39:00.004+08:00

Finally, my beau that I have long desired for. Our arms entwined, I won't let go, nuzzled him with the every chance I could grab. It was blastoff. We went to the silver screen, caught Ip Man at Shaw. It wasn't the best cine ordeal though. Perhaps worthier next time, GVmax? Munch on late supper with cab back home. Thanks to my boy. For the fourth day straight, I am going to curl myself on the couch reminiscing the frolics. I am going to have a good night sleep.

So should you. Goodnight souls and creatures.

living the sky with diamonds.

2010-06-24T14:25:00.007+08:00

With another night of crashing on the couch of my living room, I began to ponder about my twilight abundance. The spacious that I have being alone in the pitch dark having the whole arena to myself where all the sounds went to sleep and the breeze started to swim. I am enjoying this. Finally, I get to meet my paramour. I'm trying to be all cool like that but really, I'm just a happy little joyous girl. I hope in the world of Utopia, this stays till the night dawn.

Thank you Juli for the day before today. I need to shrug off everything and laughed it out. We'll dine out again, gorge ourselves with all the nourishment we can grab and talk about how such a nerd and a noob we are. ♥

2010-06-24T00:00:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday to my dearest brother; Muhammad Romzie.

May all the stars shine upon you and glitters your way through every path of your forever never ending journey.

May the joyous occasion that you had will be a polaroid memory that is unforgettable.

pouring.

2010-06-23T14:38:00.008+08:00

Just when I said it's sunny back behind my imaginative pours with thunders and lightnings, it happened. Snuggling my blanket at the corner of my room, I can do nothing but to wish for your presence. The only thing that I yearn the most now. I couldn't say it directly to you. Damn these egos. I wished you could hear the voice inside my head. I really want you right now. I'll just keep mum about everything and save the little joy when I see you my boy. Plus, I ditched my campus event; something that I feel is not worth attending for.

My body smells like yours. My hair smells like yours.

thought you knew.

2010-06-23T00:23:00.002+08:00

Graduated High School. Smoked cigarettes. Got so drunk you passed out. Rode every ride at an amusement park. Collected something really stupid. Gone to a rock concert. Helped someone. Gone fishing. Watched four movies in one night. Gone long periods of time without sleep. Lied to someone. Snorted cocaine. Failed a class. Smoked weed. Dealt drugs. Taken a college level course. Been in a car accident. Been in a tornado. Done hard drugs. Watched someone die. Been to a funeral. Burned yourself. Ran a marathon. Your parents got divorced. Cried yourself to sleep. Spent over $150 in one day. Flown on a plane. Cheated on someone. Been cheated on. Written a 10 page letter. Gone skiing. Been sailing. Cut yourself. Had a best friend. Lost someone you loved. Shoplifted something. Been to jail. Had detention. Skipped school/class. Got in trouble for something you didn’t do. Stolen books from the library. Gone to a different country. Dropped out of school. Been in a mental hospital. Watched the “Harry Potter” movies. Fired a gun. Had an online diary blog. Gambled in a casino. Had a yard sale. And a lemonade stand. Actually made money at the lemonade stand. Been in a school play. Been fired from a job.Taken a lie detector test. Swam with dolphins. Gone to sea world. Voted for a contestant from tv. Written poetry. Read more than 20 books a year. Gone to Europe. Loved someone you couldn’t have. Wondered about your sexuality. Used a coloring book over age 12. Had surgery. Had stitches. Taken a taxi. Seen the Washington Monument. Had more than 5 IM’s/online conversations going at once. Overdosed. Had a drug or alcohol problem. Been in a fist fight. Suffered any form of abuse. Had a hamster. Petted a wild animal. Used a credit card. Gone surfing in California. Did “spirit day” at school. Dyed your hair. Got a tattoo. Had something pierced. Got straight A’s. Been on the Honor Roll. Known someone with HIV or AIDS.Taken pictures with a webcam. Started a fire. Had a party while your parents weren’t home. Gotten caught having a party while they were gone.

the undying optimist.

2010-06-22T23:13:00.017+08:00

Wrapping myself under the blanket on a very sunny day but it feels as though it's pouring heavily outside with thunders and lightnings. I seemed afraid. But it's not the weather that I blame. Sometimes, being at home for a long time is unsuitable for me. People might not understand. And in this situation, even I don't understand too. Sad. It's the semester break and I don't want to be in the campus anymore. I just don't want it anymore. I need my friends. My real friends. Friends whom I share my joy with and whom I drown my sorrows with. It's really been awhile and it's either one of us cannot make it. I remember those time when I'm facing problems and they were there for me. No, I don't need their advice. I just want them to listen and be there for me. Being able for them to cry hearing my story with me. Alas, I know they care. I know they are somewhere around me. But with my absence, god knows. I'm saying this not that I hate my sp friends. I assure you, I don't. And I'm not saying they're fake. Cause they aren't. It's still hard for me to open up to them and talk about almost everything. You know, the kind of friends you hi and bye with. Yeah, that. It's going to take awhile, it might take a long time, or even so, forever. I got no clue. I just hate it when people thinks that I got so much free time on hand cause I don't. Even so, I'm not always around at home and it pretty much making me feel like going out as fast as I can cause the moment I spend just a day at home resting, everyone makes me feel like I'm the most laziest kid at home. So why do I stay? I wonder. I shan't talk about it. I just need someone to turn to. I'm glad I have my boy. I hope. He assured me and I know he'll be there. But it's the kind of feeling that makes you horrified. What if he's not? How does it feel if you know that you only have that one someone that you could turn to but still feeling afraid that one single thing you do might anger him and he's not there anymore. I don't want to put on a strong front in eyes of everyone anymore. I'm just a weakling. Sagittarius is supposed to be having that undying optimistic attitude. Where has that gone to?

If ♥ do stumble upon this. Thank you for being there for me. You're great and awesome but what am I going to do without you. You are my brolly when it rains, you are my shelter when it shines, you are my bed when I needed rest, you are my pillow when I need a hug. You are my tissue when I cry and just about everything, you are my life. You can't be 24/7 here for me I know, but I just wish every single moment spent with you will be the best moments I'll always cherish. You're the first and forever and a day, my last. I love you boy, so very much.

2010-06-21T14:56:00.006+08:00

We families had a Costume Party event over at Mami's place. Initially, I had no plans to dress up. But sudden plan from the others to dressed me up as a ghost, pretty much pontianak. Others became Paris Hilton, Beyonce Knowles, Harry Potter, Chun Li, Ariel the little mermaid, Red Indian and also Pocong. Shoot some pictures and play tons of games. Eventful day. We had lots of gifts too! More pictures on Facebook. But last.

Spiderman. Heh.

Anyway, rushed to work after that to celebrate a little birthday gathering for Marvin. For now, Happy Belated Birthday Marvin Solis Estrada.

2010-06-18T01:57:00.004+08:00

With all the love in this world, it's been ages since I've updated this personal space. There's not much add(s) to my life but everything is going according to planned, as I am concerned. It's normal with the shit-happens moment but fulfilling every breath I breathed. My contemporary life is never too dull but it isn't too provocative to be shared, to you at most. Still wondering why I am loitering here, aren't you? Felt like it. Brief summary: Having my two-weeks school break. Doesn't feel like one though. Too busy with work, yes the same work I've been slogging for the past 1 year 5 months. Watching one by one stepping their legs out from the hell and heaven. Best of luck. School's usual. Plus plus projects. And yeah, that, I'm slogging too. It spelled boredom.

I had an awesome time yesterday. I went out with ♥, Marvin S. Estrada and adik Nafis. We had to travel prolly more than the usual 2.4km we did during back in days, just to find Pizza Hut in town which I happened to stumble upon every time I am not going to dine there. Thank you very much. We finally did, after travelling to and fro and still ending up in LP. Yes, Lucky Plaza. Flooded at the basement, terrible. Had to fulfill my crave, I got Lasagna. Orders for garlic bread, Chicken Ole, large Super Supreme, double for Lasagna and dessert. Total bill amount are closed to 100$. Double awesome. We went back to Cathay to catch Karate Kid without adik. The movie is great, hilarious and definitely kind of heartwarming. Trust Marvin to have "hid" the Pocky away from me. I wanted to enjoy that with eyes set on the movie alright. It's done anyway. Marvin is gonna get it. Adik met up with us again to have dinner at KFC and we were all set to go home. At least, they did. I think I made ♥ angry but we are alright now. My awesome boy.

I'm blogging straight after work and I'm totally dead beat. Have to be back in campus at 0900 hours later for project meeting and the whole world is praying that I'll be on time tomorrow. Please. I have to go to sleep soon. Alas, I'll be late. We are going to catch up with one another soon alright? Take care and have a good night, and a very good morning later on.

2010-05-24T16:11:00.003+08:00

Can you go

instead?

HEHE.

tumblr-ing

2010-05-22T02:20:00.003+08:00

This place is so freaking dead. I've been more active on my tumblr so, pardon that. Tumblr is spontaneous thoughts from me so it's much easier, considering the crazy time I'm having right now. But I don't have much to update. So really, what's the point? Plus plus, posting this so late at night is so out of my point 'cause I'm getting frigging sleepy already. So let's just hope there's something to update the next time I wanna post something. Gotta wake up tmr morning to go study with ♥ before work. Till then I see you soon. (:

Go to my tumblr if my blog is gonna bore you. Goodnight now.

2010-05-07T20:00:00.005+08:00

♥ I can't keep my mind off you.

2010-05-06T18:59:00.003+08:00

Even by posting it here, I just wished no one would read this. I just wanna let out things. Go away from this page please.

I just want you here now.

I really don't know what to do without you. Whatever seems right, now seems so wrong. I'm just so lost right now. Just the thought of you leaving me. Please. I really need you. You're worth loving, every day, every night, every hour and every second. You are my everything. And whatever you said won't make me love you any lesser. I see my future only with you. With you. We've been through a lot and is it going to a waste? Damn, I fucking love you. The more I try to hate you, the more I damn love you. Don't do this to me please. I know everything you said wasn't true. Please tell me it's not true. What's life without you? Damn it.

I LOVE YOU.

2010-04-27T00:51:00.005+08:00

you've made me one hyper not-so-little girl.

♥ i love you.

2010-04-23T21:40:00.005+08:00

Celebrated Meng Shan, Yue Qi, Kirisan, Shuaicheng and Zhen Yang birthdays.

Happy Birthday! Best wishes.

Alright. This is basically why I don't like to be home so early. I don't see the point staying at home alone with nothing to do. Okay, perhaps I got lots of assignment ahead of me but still. It's boring having the whole house to yourself at times like this. No one is at home. Forget it. Anyway, yay. The first week of school is over. I miss my ol' mates so much. I need to catch up with them soon. School is definitely a drag. Lecture after lecture, tutorial after tutorial, and plus, queues of projects. It's only the first week though. Dangg. Sometimes, I feel like I'd rather work. But what? I'm working tmr from 1200 to 2300. So don't be so sure.

HAHAHA.

I forgot. Thanks adik nafis. You treat kakak and abang eat desserts at breeks. Should have told us that you are treating us lah. We ate at Banquet beforehand, so our stomach is kind of full. Next time again, maybe? I'm so broke right now. I'll only get my pay in like what, 17 days after? I'm always complaining I'm broke am I? LOL. Okay fine, I'll keep quiet about that.

notefor♥ ;

hey, i love you.

throbbing mind.

2010-04-19T23:58:00.003+08:00

fuck my migraine. sorry. but seriously. dangg, this is so torturous and i have no clue why i'm still blogging with this condition. my head is like throbbing. hate it so much. first day of school is fine. could be better. it's weird bumping into ♥ in school. i mean we only work together. will and must get used to it. imagine just see each other, a quick hello and done already. will do. and just so you know, ♥ is sick too. and so am i, as you can see. head to amk hub to accompany him shop for a bag after school and we got home by bus. butt cramps sey. we literally doze off in the bus like nobody's business. and migraine is getting worst. please be well tmr. i'm working. and plus plus fyi, prices for school books is gonna cost a bomb. i am do going to die. okay okay, i don't think i can type anything anymore. rest well soon love. goodnight. starting at nine tmr. until twelve. crap kan. okay bye. (:

DBIT/FT/1B/23

2010-04-15T00:05:00.004+08:00

hey. meet my new classmates. amazing 21 students. though not all of them are here. so our first group photos. i hope we are gonna be good mates. i'm still in the process of remembering names and faces matching. i can remember, tiq, leon, peiyi, huijun, rashid, shawn, shuaicheng, mellisa, mengshan, sharala, kirisan, eric, yue qi, cherlyn, ivan, and, uhm and uh. it's a good for starters right. for the rest that i didn't mention. i either remember their face only or their name only. i'll familiarize them tmr, for i'm having the sp flag day. not looking forward. i only look forward to breakfast with mates. cause i damn hungry lah. have to be back on campus at 14oo hours. i don't know if i should attend the welcome party. most prolly not. i can't wait to see ♥ tmr. haha. really.i miss you so much! so i'm going to rush down to s.t. as fast as i can that even flash would be crying. yeah whatever please. did i mention? i don't like the class timetable. i can't work as often as i did before and thats pretty much, a total wtf moment. i definitely have to suck in for the weekends lah. loving my life, but complaining wise, will never stop. human nature that is. right right. i so need to get a portable hard disk. when's the next it fair uh? i want it at a cheaper price. kemut. haha. i was so tired today. sleep throughout the train ride. came home straight to my bed. on the phone with &hearts for awhile. the moment we hang up, i hibernated. haha. and for that, i also slept throughout the afternoon. it's a good sleep but when i wake up, i realized that it was just a nap and not a sleep that i always have. i was so happy that i'll be sleeping again later. retard ass. i don't want to be on the lappy for too long. have a great night everyone and mates, i'll see you tmr morning.

and ♥you; see you very very soon.

2010-04-11T15:27:00.004+08:00

School commencing very soon. In less than 12 hour? Wahlamak. Ha! Am I looking forward? I don't know. I wouldn't say I'm not looking forward, but this week is just gonna be orientation. And I don't dig orientation, please. Looking on the bright side, meeting many more awesome people for my partners in crime. It's already 3 in the morning and I haven't sleep yet. It's hard being nocturnal, especially when it's school term. Dangg. Work was crazy just now. Not as in fun crazy. But tiring crazy. Sudden crowd is such an ass. Customer was so into complaining today and it was such a hell. Sales wasn't high, although we hit the target. So much voids too. Doing closing cashier, damn boring boring. What's even crazy is with ♥. But never mind, I shall not utter anything. (: Damn I gotta go sleep soon. Hope I have a great day in school and so shall everyone else too. Have a good late night.

2010-04-05T02:51:00.008+08:00

I need to update. I need to update.

So, things have been happening quite fast lately. And as so many of you know, I got my ITE final results and the poly posting result.

Am I happy...?

Damn, this? I'm a happy girl.

But the life-changing choice that I got.

I'm a very happy girl. Somehow, everything have been going well for me all around. With families and friends, work and my school And definitely my ♥. The life I wanted is all right here in my hands. So really. How can I not be happy? I didn't mean to post it late at night. I'm exhausted, I'm sleepy, I'm hungry. But I don't know when I can post this if not now. I'm a very busy person, you see. XD Just kidding. I'm meeting up with my ISS friends this Wednesday, hopefully and also the Girls' Clan on the 11th and 12th April cause it's been ages since we met, and I'm really sorry about that. I'll be taking my enrollment package at SP later, accompanied by ♥, Jia Rong and Nafis. As much as I hate work, my Shin Tokyo service crewmates have been the best buds.

We are crazy all that. (:

2010-03-27T13:36:00.003+08:00

Have been wanting to update but so shagged this past few days. Therefore, here I am posting a quickie update before leaving for work. Had my KL Class Chalet at NSRCC last Monday. A three days two night. I only had a few hours of sleep throughout. That explain my shag-ness. (: Anyway, enjoyed it, having to spend the last moments with my beloved classmates. We played games and had so so many round of cigarettes, I swear. I will always remember the day, especially when it's the day that I learned how to play mahjong. Hehehe. The past two years that we spent together is beginning to make me realize how short the time span was. I can only pretty much hope we would still get in touch with one another.

Thanks to KL and mainly Nat for making it happen. (:

2010-03-21T02:17:00.006+08:00

HEY APPLE!

waaaaaasssssuuuuuuupp.

Okay, shut up already. (: I went out with my two dear porks, uh no. We are now fruits, everyone. Let's start again. I went out with Aida, the banana, Jannah, the apple, William, the plumpkin and Ganesh, the kiwi. And you don't wanna know who's the orange. Ha. Met up to have a little celebration for Apple's belated celebration at Esplanade rooftop. Really haven't been there for such a long long time. We got ourselves strawberry shortcake cake. Ate most of it and messed around with it afterwards. We really got no plan after that so we end up not ending up watching movie, if you know what I mean. Munched my six-inched Italian sandwich tuna with lettuce, mustard and mayo before further slacking. Roamed around Somerset 313 and was super bored, we end up hanging out outside the toilet. One corner which fit us 5 very nicely on the seats. (: I swear it was the randomness thing ever. For one and a half hour there, my, it was one hell of a time there. XD

I had fun today though. And hey, I miss you over there, ♥

Orange gotta go now.

2010-03-18T14:39:00.005+08:00

As I'm posting this, it's pouring quite heavily outside and it's damn, a great weather to sleep in. And please forgive me, cause in this such weather, I am listening to Justin Bieber. I do get it why people actually consider him as a ghey boy, and being unquestionably young. I'm not here to bitch about him nor I am here to sing praises. Oh hell no. Baby is the only song that I feel its music to my ears from him. Him being in this music industry makes the Jonas Brothers feel so old, am I right? Ha. *selfdistracts* God, I'm hungry. Let me change song before I continue. 5 seconds. (:

Faber Drive- Died in your Arms Tonight.

Much better. Okay up next. I went out with ♥ yesterday and I swear it's been awhile since I laughed that much. I'm glad things are going fine for us. We hang out, he accompanied me grab my brunchner; chicken rice and help me to eat some too. Ha. And spontaneous decision we always have, we decided to watch movie. After long long long time, we made up our mind to catch Alice in Wonderland 3-D @ 2100 hours. Still got half an hour to spare, gave a quick Hi to Jann who is now working at Causeway Point's Breeks, and as usual, we smoked, and tried the new Heaven and Earth's Ice Lemon Tea. The difference between this and Season's Ice Lemon Tea? Heaven and Earth is more to the Lemon while Season is more to the tea. I cracked up a joke asking which brand is more to the Ice then? XD If you get what I mean. And ♥ have to force himself to laugh. Sorrylah. Ha. And sorry plus plus that I annoyed you by being an annoying orange. *smirks*

Now for the review? I would say you won't miss much if you didn't catch this one. Not saying it's not good, but it's just so-so. The 3-D effect made it a little bit more interesting but I don't really dig the specs 'cause it's quite torturous. It's the first Tim Burton's movie that I really feel like watching, as I'm not really a fan for this type of genre you see. But I heart the costumes that Alice wore, interesting. (: I like Mad Hatter the most cause number one, he's played by Johnny Depp. Number two, he's quite a humor when he dances at the last part which made me go what-the-fuck and laughed at the same time. ♥, you love the Cheshire Cat right? And the blue caterpillar who kept sheesha-ing? XD Ha. You got a few after the movie too. You should know what I'm talking about. (: I never knew the real fairytale story of Alice in Wonderland and I'm sure the movie and the real one are anethetic. But oh well, should consider flipping my old fairytale book soon. (: And I'm sure I've said this before, even if I watched the worse movie ever, watching with ♥ is still the best!

Chatted and hang out after the movies and I reached home around 0200 hours. And I forgot that I had dental appointment early in the morning. Damn right. And for I-don't-know-why, I woke up 5 in the morning just now, grab a bite and went back to sleep. So random. XD Speaking about that, I'm so hungry and I'm not sure if I'm gonna get real food today. ): I'll just go get anything. Still great weather to sleep, I think I'll go take a nap. Goodnight? (:

P/S Yami, I just felt like disturbing you by Ha-ing. (:

2010-03-17T12:16:00.001+08:00

2010-03-15T15:47:00.003+08:00

to love.

2010-03-12T03:12:00.002+08:00

2010-03-11T01:37:00.001+08:00

2010-03-09T00:24:00.005+08:00

And so, I know I'm days late, but whatever it is, ITE has officially ended for me. And dangg, I miss all my mates already. It's been two effing short years and it just felt like I just started school only days back. I still remember orientation quite clearly with our old mates still around. I thought I got in the wrong class. But no, luckily. Having to spend this odyssey, I start off entering the campus with damn a cold heart and a pessimistic side. I figured out, "damn all this mats and minahs". But who would have thought, it actually depends on who you are mixing with. Having to choose which kind of peers you wanna be with is very important. Wrong companion? There goes your life. So, fortunately for me, Clementi campus is quite a wonderful campus to begin with. Yeah, we don't have great facilities, buildings are all short and rotten. But overall, I still think that its first-class cause it's not the usual ITE people you would see every time you go home. Those who don't study, and go to school for the sake of coming. We're quite studious, you see. Well, most of us, and at times. We do need breaks afterall. So for me, I got quite a great class and cliques I mixed with are oh-so-awesome. Sometimes they may be a pain in the ass. Especially my group mates. But at the end of the day, everything goes well as planned. Thank god. As for my class, KL. Thank you for everything you have done and not done for me. (: Being the youngest in class, I feel like you guys and girls have been a good brothers and sisters. Except for Ang of course. (You like my father already) LOL. I hope that we're still gonna get in contact and I can't wait to meet you guys again during the chalet. I miss you people loads. Love you, and our teachers def.

goodnight. (:

2010-03-08T02:02:00.000+08:00

live like we're dying.

2010-03-04T21:06:00.003+08:00

2010-03-01T11:15:00.001+08:00

LOL

2010-02-27T13:20:00.000+08:00

once and for all.

2010-02-25T23:40:00.006+08:00

I swear this is one of the ghastly feeling I've longed had. No, nothing much. I just don't feel good about my stomach. I didn't get anything heavy today and the last food I ate was just two plain pratas with my smexy boy for dinner. I literally lay down on the bus on my way home. I need to get rid of this feeling now, do I? Crap.

Today is the submission date for both my AIT and EBP project. Wah~ At last. Such a stressful week to think about and now that's left is EBP presentation and PIC project. After next week, school butt-end? For real? I think it's too fast. It's not just the end of the semester. It's the end if my ITE year. Like I'm not schooling there no more! I'm gonna miss the plainless dull food there, the teachers whom I always bully, all my friends who always come to school like suka-hati-mak-bapak-diorang. XD I'll definitely miss it.

Tired lately. I always doze off whenever I have the chance and my head keep jerking down when I slept in the train. Woh, Like now. As I'm typing, my eyes are half-opened and I'm gonna sleep again in 5...2, 1.

♥nightnightmatesandlove.

and to you,

2010-02-17T18:24:00.004+08:00

SYUHA has tumblr!

just for the fun of it.

to you,

2010-02-17T02:02:00.000+08:00

I'm sorry. ):

2010-02-16T18:21:00.004+08:00

2010-02-15T00:14:00.001+08:00

A bit late for the wish though but who the hell cares? Happy lunar new year too. I'm having a bad flu. Drinking Hot Lipton Tea to let my immune system get better. I need to have an early night. Working from 13oo hours till closing. Nuu~ Alright folks, g'night. ♥

P/S Happy Birthday Cousin Atikah. (:

2010-02-11T13:56:00.004+08:00

I know, who the hell in the whole entire downright universe update their blog in such short time. Get me not, I'm effing bored. Didn't attend school today, so not looking forward to work. Well, honestly, I'm not looking forward to anything at all. Fucking lethargic. I don't know what I'm doing right now. I just need to rant? Pardon me please. Had a cigarette the moment I woke up, and right now, I wanna smoke again. I'm so desirous but I definitely have no appetite right now. Maybe, that's why it sounds like I'm substituting food for a puff, or two, or more. You know what I mean. Wasting my morning away watching Definitely, Maybe. Watched Asian Food Channel, which made me baked myself brownies. But what? Instant noodles. *sighs* Let's just skip eating today? Oh, maybe I'm grumpy right now 'cause I'm famished. I just feel like swearing and cursing myself lah. I think I'm gonna get myself some extra sleep before I get ready for work.

*shrugs* Fine, I'll get a smoke and, g'night. Yet again.

yes i do!

2010-02-11T13:31:00.002+08:00

god knows what.

2010-02-10T12:15:00.005+08:00

...not really exactly a woman though

Anyway, what made me think that I am one? Just that I already applied for the JPAE. Seriously, everyone was giving me advices on which courses I should apply for and since I'm a 4-pointer, I should indubitably consider my first choice very carefully. It was totally a mess at first. For sheeze, I had no fucking idea.

And so, after lots of thinking,

First choice: SP [Business Information Technology]
Second Choice: NP [Business Studies]
Third Choice: NYP [Business Management]
Fourth Choice: NYP [Marketing]
Fifth Choice: SP [Integrated Event & Project Management]

What do you guys think? Well, I'm still not too late to reconsider, since closing date is this Friday but, I'm not planning to make any changes. But god knows what the hell I'm thinking. Let's just see, I guess.

------------------------

I might not know about Valentines' Day.

But I know,

Valentines' Day is not all about flowers and chocolates.

FML NO MORE. (:

2010-02-09T00:31:00.006+08:00

The same day I posted about my mislaid possesions, I found it. Isn't that oh-so-wonderful. Registration for poly is open and I'm still stuck in a dilemma. Sister have already decided on her choices and here I am like an awesome pig stoning around. Well, there's still few more days right. Let me consider it for awhile.

I've already prepared a can of Reb Bull with a cup of ice and couple of chocolate biscuits so I can watch those Ga-in and Kwonnie with lots of love. I swear they are the cutest couple ever!

is it too sleazy to be doing the xoxo ending?

FINE, I WON'T.

Sleep early people. Goodnight.

2010-02-07T13:14:00.011+08:00

As of now, I am typing with pricks on my arm that my sister caused, which made me bleed. Therefore, I would like to take this opportunity to fucking express my gratitude to her. FML.

Anyway, if you haven't heard, I lost my ez-link card and IC. Crap right~!? Being mega-negligent these days. There goes half of my pay. Uh, I don't wanna think about it anymore. FML (x2) Lose things never mind, so long I never lose people, can already. If you know what I mean. *giggles*

Plus plus, tmr is the opening date for us to apply for poly. I'm

fazed but I don't wanna think. I'll prolly pursue my course further. But but, idk eh. I need to figure it out. FAST. International Business kinda appeal to me too but I'm not sure if HN Cert. holders are eligible to apply. Thinking of applying for poly is one thing, but I still have my projects to finish up. For sheeze, what a life am I leading man. So much chaos.

Anyway, ♥Valentine's Day is around the corner. (So is the CNY)

What's your plan? (:

happy february

2010-02-01T10:37:00.003+08:00

I bet it's gonna be a huge awesome Febby.

even for whatever happened,

2010-01-31T14:16:00.002+08:00

♥ forever and a day; ily!

--------------------------------------

Singapore flyer with classmates last Friday was a little bit better than I thought.

I'm sure I'm gonna miss them when we graduate.

All the best to you people.

2010-01-30T13:15:00.005+08:00

I'll never reach the top if I would have to take that stairs. It's fun. (:

2010-01-28T10:58:00.001+08:00

going gaga.

2010-01-27T20:25:00.007+08:00

Missing someone isn't about how long it has been since you've seen them or the amount of time since you've talked. It's about that very moment you're doing something and they were right there with you.

just for the fun of it

damn my cell.

2010-01-26T19:30:00.000+08:00

And finally, my, oh wait. Oh, my Principles of International Commerce written exam is done. (Forgot my module for awhile. XD) No more written exam and at least there's something off my load. But projects are piling up and it's still a brain-wrecking moment. I still have to suffer for a month more until I graduate, which unfortunately is no more less stress. Then again, what's new. It's time for me to think about my choice of course in poly. Damn, this hard life. OTL.

Phone's down for now, and it sucks a lot. It's definitely gonna be difficult to get in contact with "people". Gonna be back earliest tmr night, latest the day after. Or maybe not. ): I cannot live without my phone just like how Jann cannot live without her lappy. XD And we both know why.

I'll be just waiting till late night.
♥ I wanna see you tmr.
I'm craving for you just like how I craved for nachos.

2010-01-25T21:18:00.004+08:00

had to post something anyway.

2010-01-19T00:19:00.006+08:00

who would have thought this not-so-little hyperactive girl could be so cheesy. fuggit, imy. ♥

"I wanna be a cyborg"

2010-01-18T11:04:00.004+08:00

Gonna post something in the morning before I get too lazy. (:

Out yesterday with you-know-who. *evilsmiles*

Had an afternoon movie at GVmax.

The movie was great. Considering it was half action-packed movie (Jackie Chan, duh, what do you expect?), it was actually quite heart-warming in a way. It's so funny and entertaining. Plus, even after the movie ended, it showed NGs. XD And it reminds me of The Pacifier cause it almost had the same storyline. But who cares, I enjoyed both. (:

After contemplating where to go (as usual again. ^^), we ended up eating at Seoul Garden at Takashimaya. And of course, we left with stomach full and bloated.

We left after that. It was so quick but I still enjoyed myself.

Cause to me, it was not just watching movie and eating.

It was something more. ♥

to school now.

2010-01-15T03:34:00.001+08:00

and I seriously need to get some sleep soon. (:

PASTAMANIAC.

2010-01-12T23:43:00.005+08:00

Treat my parents and sister Pastamania for dinner today. Damn full. XD

I gotta think something for my Flash Project cause the storyline have to be handed in by tmr and I'm still at loss. But, but! I have a great idea. I'm so gonna do a ninja story, just because I dreamt about it. Cool right!? =.=" Okay whatever, at least I have something in mind.

And yeah, I actually wanted to take pictures from Pastamania. But I didn't.

(: Goodnight.

♥ P.S. i miss you anyway.

TWENTYYAMI.

2010-01-11T02:08:00.005+08:00

Yami's birthday ended two hours ago. I only got to wished her through Twitter. So here I am. Happy Birthday Yami~! Turned 20 le. Oh hey, getting my pay later in the afternoon. It feels so at-last. (: I bet all my other colleagues are glad too. Got back from work an hour plus ago.And I'm so damn exhausted. Sleeping "soon" ♥

goodnight.

2010-01-07T12:08:00.006+08:00

get well soon. ♥

the rev.

2010-01-04T22:30:00.007+08:00

In loving memory,

James Owen Sullivan
February 10, 1981 – December 28, 2009

For being such a wonderful drummer who gets high drunk
for his passion for music and ~~pints~~.
For being an awesome musician,
creating avant-garde tremendously great notes for metals.

For being the best brother for his hardcore mates in a7x.
A great loss in the music industry, be it mainstream or underground.
Remember always.

How can I forget to update on such important thing. OTL.

Goodbye twentyohnine, Hello twentyten.

2010-01-04T02:11:00.004+08:00

hell, so cliche.

A very late wish but better late than never. (:
Twentyohnine is a very memorable but as always, shit does happen.
And it happened definitely for a reason.
Meeting many people from different walks of life.
I'll never forget that year but wishing twentyten will be a better twentyohnine.
As for New Year's resolution, fugg that.
I'll plan it daily.

To my dearest sister, happy 20th birthday honey. (:

School's tmr and I'm glad it starts at one.
I wanted to update more but I'm too high for the night.
Somebody made me that way. LOL.

pretty much,
goodnight.
♥

2009-12-26T02:11:00.006+08:00

MERRY X' MAS

2009-12-25T01:51:00.007+08:00

Since I'm always laughing at my own lame jokes, here I am, LOL-ing for explosm.

Tardy and exhausted. Okay, bye.

2009-12-23T02:34:00.003+08:00

My Fortune Cookie:
If you want the rainbow, you must put up with the rain.

Who's the unruly lass who's been coming home dilatory?
Broke until next year. oh, I'm such a sucker for money-saver.
Ate loads today and having a minor pounding head.
Cause I'm hungry. Did I mention eating loads?
How contradicting. (:

very well, goodnight.

2010

2009-12-21T14:43:00.005+08:00

counting the days to next year.
fugg new year's resolution, it's made for a daily one.
don't mind about me, I'm sure not even you can stick to one right?
knew it. (:

too fast.

P/S: "smexy smexy", you gotta problem with that, baby? XD

HOPE YOU ARE NOT READING THIS.

2009-12-18T14:17:00.004+08:00

A crack ass random joke .

Had Fish & Co. and Marvelous Cream with Yami yesterday.
And I even ate a big bowl of Korean rice with chicken with smexy boy before that.
Oh, for I have sinned, I shall eat less today, NOT. XD

I SEE YOU.

2009-12-17T02:24:00.006+08:00

Watched Avatar with the smexy boy today. It was awesome although it's a long two and a half hour movie AND we had to sit in the front row cause that's the only seats available. We were planning to watch at Causeway Point but the next showtime was quite late. So somehow, we ended up at AMK Hub. He was reminiscing the old times he had at the outlet that was demolished around there. And from what he said, almost the whole place looks different. As for me, I pretty much have no clue 'cause I've been to AMK for like what, one time only? XD Anyway, definitely recommending this movie to everyone out here.

Did I tell you? I had fun today. Always do.

Initial plan for tmr is to meet Yami and Jann but I guess we have to postpone it. Right, sleep now so I can wake up damn early tmr. Oyasumi.

2009-12-16T13:48:00.000+08:00

not going to work. *evilgrins*

eighteenchefs for the eighteen-er.

2009-12-15T01:50:00.000+08:00

I'm back with totally some of the shots of my girls' clan during my birthday celebration at eighteenchefs (again). Awesome people aren't they? Enough said, I owe you this for too long already.

starting with the people that made it all happen.

syuha with a ♥
took the S. (:

the staffs there.

two hungry happy people. XD

Posted the rest on FB, so it's up to your intelligence to find it on your own.

-----------------------------

One day rest and I'm back to work again tmr. Kak IzD won't come to work for this few days I guess. Get well soon, gangster tempang? (: Alright, I shall get my sleep now so that I can wake up early to meet that smexy little boy for breakfast.

Goodnight ♥.

♥ recklessly.

2009-12-08T15:26:00.010+08:00

This is not a self-~~in-denial~~ post. (:
love your friends, your family, your whosoever.
treasure every piece of them like they are in you.
even if they're gone, forever or
whatever, 'cause...
who knows, they might still come back.

Anyway, internet at home is down at the moment, so pretty much could update this little thing now that I have the chance. But to sum up, birthday was a joy but it wasn't something grand to talk about. Gotta thank almost everyone who celebrated with me even with the slightest thing. I still haven't got the pictures from Mas during the Birthday Celebration at 18chefs with my girls' clan, so as soon as I get, I update okay.

And so, what's up with me now? Okay okay lor. hehe. (: Maybe a little bit more than okay. LOL. Somehow things are kinda go smoothly for me and I take all negativity as a challenge and turned it to all the positive energy I can get. Oh, I feel so optimistic-ish. My PIC test was over this morning, and I think I did quite well. Much better than the first one definitely. I'm trying my best not to disappoint anyone. Actually, it was rather amusing since I went home quite late and I ended revision earlier than my usual burning midnight oil session. Maybe the picture text you sent that was supposed to be a motivation worked? LOL. Works well indeed. Thanks. I owe you. Okay no. YOU owe me you-know-what. Do that and I'll put you to sleep. XD

I've been having bad cough for almost two weeks now. I would like to "gladly" apologized to all my mates, especially those in class who gotta suffer by listening to my damn loud irritating cough although I'm sitting in the back like an anti-social. The cause might be due to cigarettes, but maybe NOT. And speaking about that, I've hid no more things from my parents now that they know I'm a ~~heavy~~ smoker. It wasn't as bad as I thought. No thrashing, no nothing. But hey, I'm not taking advantage of it. ~~Lessen for now~~. YEAH RIGHT!

PIC out and AIT this... when is it again? Thursday? Friday? God, I always forget such stuff. Oh, i guess I should be AIT-ing right now. Hope this Friday outing with Porkypies featuring Kinney and Yanto, and don't-know-who-else. (: I'll come by again soon okay. See you ♥.

2009-12-01T19:25:00.001+08:00

So bad that I coughed out blood. ):
Really wanted to update pictures and stuff but not today, I guess.

I'll be back.
^-^

2009-11-27T11:15:00.005+08:00

Happy 18th Birthday, me.

I'll post something soon. For now, let me have my own day.

2009-11-24T19:21:00.004+08:00

total webcam spam ftw.

P/S You know what I just realized when I post all this ~~pig~~picspam on Facebook?
That my face looked like Mr Bean. XD

2009-11-23T21:42:00.001+08:00

2009-11-22T12:35:00.011+08:00

Can I MIA today? Like seriously.

I really have no mood for work today. Really shagged. What should I look forward to there? ):

Well, enough said. For 2 days, back, I had two advanced celebrations for my birthday and I'm really thankful to all the people. Last Friday, we had CrazyISS dinner together with Fatin, Hamzy and Alif at 18Chef. Total awesome cause we had communication problem for that day and our plan was confusing. but it end up so well. After we ordered, Fatin brought out brownies cake for me. I wasn't expecting anything but that is so sweet of her. And al the waiters and waitresses there sang a birthday song for me. And guess what, ice-cream on the house. Adding on to another scoop of ice-cream I had. Wow. Tu lah, mintak banyak sangat ice-cream dari orang kan, ambik kau. XD It was a simple outing. We chatted a lot about stuffs but I have to apologized to you three darlings, I didn't want to share much things about what happened in my life so I either kept quiet or change topic. Huhu~ Cause it's enough-about-me. Sat at MacD and talk more. I swear, that was one of the most hilarious night I've longed had. (: Having my cheeks all cramped up. You guys made my day. Thanks.

And as for yesterday, had BBQ Party @ ECP. Azri picked us up by car and we got lost for a few hours. LOL. Anyway, it was again awesome. I met new friends, especially Kin and Yanto. I swear both of them is the most craziest guy ever. They raped me with scotchtape and I was literally ROFLMAO-ing. Thanks guys. And Jann, thanks for planning it and I really appreciate all of your gifts, no matter how @#$@$ the gifts were. XD

I really wanna blog but I'm just too exhausted. Work sian hor.
Really wonderful advanced birthdays from my two groupies.
But still...

✩; just for right now.

2009-11-18T20:34:00.006+08:00

...and I just woke up from my nap. (:

2009-11-17T19:47:00.007+08:00

It hurt so bad that I cried. Not like what you're thinking. It's my neck okay. It's been aching for like almost three weeks now and the sudden movement I did just now felt like my neck is gonna break anytime. Seriously, if you were in my shoes, you would cry too. I was pretty much moody just now. I had two real bad nightmares in one night and I won't mention what happened in details. But it was quite tragic to the two people and before anything happens, I should apologized to the two of you. Which I already did. So the moody-ness pretty much took over me for the day and I was feeling more than shitty. Class ended very early, and so I met up with Kak IzD, hoping things are gonna go okay. Which really did. Out having fun with her kids, treating them MacDs, ice-cream and drinks. Kak IzD said I'm very pamperous. Once in a while alright. (: The kids are all so cute and funny. But my favourite?

Danish~!!!

He's always quiet when he eats. And he looked so innocent when he finishes up all our food. Big eater, just like me! He reminded me of someone. His eyes is a little droopy but you should see his ass. OMG, can make satay. XD Met Ain, Daniel and Alif aka Thambi also. Really had so much fun, especially with Danish. ((: You people made my day. See you soon!

a little less moody for now-

CHEESY?!

2009-11-16T20:49:00.007+08:00

Time is slow yet fast today. Woke up early today to have breakfast with Fate at 10:30 AM and I was late by 30 minutes. (Do your calculation) However, he stood me up for another 30 minutes because of his upset stomach. So anyway, had LJS and wanna see something?

I don't know why but the change I had ended up in the cheese. Even my 2$ had cheese on it. LOL. How dumb can I get man~! Fate and the cashier had a good laugh and I was red all over. It's okay. I got my revenge cause the people sitting beside us spilled his large drink and kena Fate's bag. Huhuhuhuu~ Anywho, met him to talk regarding something and he talked about this girl, "Shr-" whom I shan't mention without his permission. (: It was all good ~~somewhat dirty~~ funny talk but yeah, he helped me quite a lot. And he could predict me and the person I was talking about to him. It was such a big ROFLMAO that I can't stop laughing even after we reached class. By the way thanks Fate. Hope your plan with Shr- turns our great. And all the best for me too? Muahahha~

Being hardworking in class today. And actually completed my assignment. I'm gonna force everyone in class to work well together. がんばってね～

Shopped for Aida's gift again. I swear I'm a total noob in gift-wrapping. Just finished it though. Who knew wrapping presents could be such a ~~whore~~ chore. Anyway so my Aida♥ just turned 18. Happy Birthday~! See you this Sat.

Somehow I feel kinda moody now.
cheers?